Change

In the past two weeks, a confluence of events has profoundly altered my life. I examined one of my great passions in my Ignite Phoenix presentation. I found inspiration to break out of the tired rut I’m in at work by attending LaidOffCamp Phoenix. And most importantly, I learned that I’m going to be father.

All of these have pushed me to consider who I am, what I’m doing and where I want to go more intensely than ever. Not only have I realized that doing what I’m passionate about is critically important for me, but now I’m faced with a larger task, larger than anything I’ve faced: I have to set an example for my own child. My actions will not only affect their opinion of me, they’ll dramatically influence my son or daughter’s fundamental view of the world. What I am will become who they are.

As I prepared for my Ignite presentation, I spent a lot of time considering what I was passionate about in addition to coffee and I realized that social media is one of those passions. Connecting with people, creating relationships, supporting others and building community are what I’m passionate about. I’m good at using social media technology to do these things. Forging human connections is one of my fundamental motivators.

What I am not passionate about is my current career. I’m a software developer by training and habit, not by desire. I build software because I majored in computer science in college. I build software because I’ve spent more than a decade doing it, not because I’m particularly excited about it. I’ve followed a path which was worn out and antiquated even before I entered a university: get a degree, get a good job, work most of your life doing one thing and retire.

This needs to end. I cannot in good conscience teach my child to do this, yet this is the example they’ll see if I don’t change.

So it’s time. Time to work in social media and do what I love. Time to stop following a path I wouldn’t want my child to follow. Time to live the example my child should see.

I will follow my passions and I will teach my child to do the same.

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http://twitter.com/krysvs krystoferJames

wow.
very yes.

team VanSlyke is definitely behind you, brother.
probably team redPear too, but most of us aren't in the office yet, so I haven't conducted a formal survey.

Kids are amazing and they have a way of making you view things differently. I look forward to sharing in your journey(s). Godspeed.
http://twitter.com/Aleshalynn Aleshalynn

Very well said!

Life is too short to not follow our passions.
http://www.Twitter.com/Free_Spirit55 Free_Spirit55

Wow. . . . .it's the only way to start a comment to such a powerful blog post! Most people stay at a job they hate because its safe and I have the utmost respect for you and your decision! Your son/daughter will be proud to have such a passionate and down to earth father!

Kudos Matt, Kudos!
http://gracebalancecourage.com Tonia

Matt…. words can't even describe how much emotion and happiness I am feeling for you right now. I can tell you I have been there and done the drastic change in career… in the area no one really considered a real career. The best part of life is living for you. It's not selfish. By living for you, you are setting an example for others, you are more happy, and others are happier by being around you and inspired by your actions. I'm honestly tearing up a little right now. Congratulations, best of luck, and you know I'm here if you need it.
http://www.echocoffee.com/ SteveBelt

Great news. FYI, I was also a software developer. Worked for IBM, AMEX, and Intel for over 12 years before leaving 6 years ago. Software was something that came very easy to me, and because it was easy, it wasn't as rewarding.

Being on your own, independent, self-sufficient is liberating, if not scary at times. I'm sure you'll do quite fine, however.
http://www.stacyholmstedt.com Stace

Good for you, Matt! Let me know if I can help you in any way.
http://tdhurst.com tdhurst

Developers with people skills are rare. Seems you'd be ideally suited to make useful sm programs!
austinmiles

I think that there is no better way to start parenthood than by changing your career path at the same time. Good on ya. Congrats again.
http://wesnovack.com/ WesleyTech

Awesome
susanbaier

Congratulations Matthew! I'm so happy for you. Life is too short not to pursue whatever you're passionate about — you and your family will be happier for it. I made a similar decision after my daughter was born and have never been happier or more fulfilled.

You have lots of people who will be there to support you in this. I sure hope I can help you as you go down this new path!
wendyconeybeer

Isn't it sad that, in our mid 30's, we're JUST NOW learning that we have an option to do the things that we enjoy to make a living rather than follow the corporate idiocracy? Better now than later, I guess. I'll be rooting for you
http://iamchanelle.com iamchanelle

so awesome.
Mark Dudlik

After going to a conference last week and listening to Bruce Mau, I think it took everything I had to not quit my job yesterday.

Thankfully, I'll never have kids so I can put it off for a bit longer, but I'm completely there with you on the idea of not wasting time during the day doing something I am not supremely proud of.

Let me know how I can help you with your moving forward.

Also, I hate you.
http://spidel.net kspidel

Amen brother. I was in your same place (sans child) 3 years ago. Took me a while.. but am thankful I hung in there. I know you will rock it! Consider me a friend and resource! You are pure awesome!
http://iamchanelle.com iamchanelle

p.s. – i am just now figuring out this concept of finding happiness in what you do for a living, and i have a seven year old. [so i am a little slow]

major props to you for wanting to lay down an incredible foundation for your family right away.

peace.
http://www.socialreflections.com Shailesh

I've come to the same kind of conclusions over the years. Pursue a passion. You were made to fill a particular spot in the Univerise. That's where you should be. Hope all works out for you! Keep us posted.
http://www.buticouldbewrong.net/ Lisa

Such an awesome post! It seems to be in the air… So many people I know (including myself) are waking up to the fact that if we are following our passions to earn our living, it isn't just “work” or something that we have to put up with.

Best of luck, and The WOnet Clan is pulling for you!
http://chris.ly/ Chris Lee

#heckarad brother.

I'm so excited for you. I'm of the same mind. While I am excited about my company and the things we're doing, it's become obvious that at some point I gotta do something with food.

I'm so excited for both you and Tracie too. It is absolutely awesome. I forsee a young #petrokid who will be able to tell a Guatemalan bean from a Sumatran been in a blind tasting.
pinkinkdesign

Very inspiring and honorable- thanks for reaffirming what we all need to consider again and again as we make our way through our professional lives… And congrats on becoming a father! : )
http://johntynan.com johntynan

Congratulations! Horray for the Petro Family! An inspiring post as well. I look forward to seeing where your passions take you and to support you and Tracie in your new adventure in new and novel ways!
http://twitter.com/boldavenue stephanie

Yay! Here's to new adventures! Congrats and all the best to you!
http://matthewpetro.wordpress.com Matthew Petro

You're right…better late than never! I don't think it's all that sad, though. To get to a point of understanding, we all have to have experiences which lead us there. For some it happens quickly, for some it takes a long time and a lot of experiences. Either way, we're better for having had those experiences.

I really do appreciate your support. Your story really gives me a lot of hope!
http://matthewpetro.wordpress.com Matthew Petro

It's great to have mortal enemies like you, Mark. Thanks for your well-spoken hate.
http://matthewpetro.wordpress.com Matthew Petro

Thanks man! I appreciate hearing that from someone who's traveled the new parent road before.
http://matthewpetro.wordpress.com Matthew Petro

Thanks Susan! Hearing your story and attending LaidOffCamp are HUGE parts of the inspiration behind this post.
http://matthewpetro.wordpress.com Matthew Petro

Like I commented to Wendy above, we all arrive at understanding in different ways and times. I'm really thankful for having a great community to both support and push me along!
Wendy Coneybeer

You know what? You're absolutely right… it's NOT sad. A good friend remarked last night about how grateful she is that I am one of few people in her life that has been able to help her cope with her divorce because I've been there and understand. My response to her was that I was very happy to be able to use such a negative experience to help her in a positive way.

Looking back at everything I've been through I wouldn't change anything, because if I did I likely wouldn't be here today. And I LIKE it here! I am still working a corporate job that gives me little to no satisfaction at the end of the day, but as Pam Slim says, this is not the “right” job, it is just the “right now” job, and it will do and pay my bills until I can work my way into something that I do have a passion for. I am, however, taking small steps almost every day to get closer to what I think I want. When I get there, I might realize that I actually want something different, but even if that's the case, this time is not wasted. It's all valuable life experience that I'll probably be able to use when I least expect it.

You certainly have an incredible support system around you. The people I've met here, and their friendliness and willingness to be supportive of others continues to impress me day-after-day.

Happy to be able to help you, and others as well! I'm finding more and more that everything does indeed seem to happen for a reason.
http://matthewpetro.wordpress.com Matthew Petro

Yeah, you gotta do something food related! That's definitely one of your great passions.

I'll be really proud if I can raise a child who not only has the coffee skills to distinguish a Guat and Sumatran coffees by taste, but who also has the geek skills to hack into their friends email.
http://matthewpetro.wordpress.com Matthew Petro

Good point about your current job being the “right now” job. Just quitting your job and hoping you can make it isn't a good strategy, but taking the steps you can take until you can have the job (either self-employed or employed by someone else) is really the best way to go about it. And doing that here in Phoenix right now is really a great opportunity! The community is truly an amazing support system, and I'm grateful for that.
http://lightrailblogger.com Tony Arranaga

The first thought that crossed my mind when I finished reading this: you are going to be an amazing father. I'm so happy for you and Tracie!
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http://www.yuriartibise.com Yuri Artibise

This is one of the things i love about living in Phoenix. Amazing people willing to step out of the 'mainstream' and do there own thing. Congrats Matthew!
http://soontobeme.wordpress.com Cody

Great post! It's amazing how a baby coming into your life makes you stop and really think about what you're doing and why. I'm going through the same thing right now, except I work in public higher ed. Not only am I not passionate about the work, my salary can be determined by the state legislature. Ugh. In any case, I think it takes a few decades for us to truly learn who we are and what we're made of. May your trailblazing into new work go well!
http://matthewpetro.wordpress.com Matthew Petro

It is a pretty amazing community around here. That's certainly one of the things that motivates me to do better.
Niki

I've know your for what…13 or 14 years now…from the good old days in the computer lab in college (and that whole – married to one of my best friends thing). This is a stunningly beautiful sentiment and one I am so thrilled to see you making. It takes courage to follow passion, but what a great lesson to teach Petrokid. Best wishes on the new venture and I want to go on record as calling the whole social media thingy what…a year ago? Much love to you both!!!
Niki

dude, I hate typos. Sorry. That should read, I've know YOU
Niki

I've know your for what…13 or 14 years now…from the good old days in the computer lab in college (and that whole – married to one of my best friends thing). This is a stunningly beautiful sentiment and one I am so thrilled to see you making. It takes courage to follow passion, but what a great lesson to teach Petrokid. Best wishes on the new venture and I want to go on record as calling the whole social media thingy what…a year ago? Much love to you both!!!
Niki

dude, I hate typos. Sorry. That should read, I've know YOU